All things being equal, it’s been a pretty bad week for Kobe Bryant. After an emasculating loss to the Boston Celtics on Tuesday, Kobe’s legacy as a ball-player has been under attack by sports commentators on both coasts.
Rubbing salt into the wound, Bodega released its “No Means No” shirt to international acclaim last week. The garment features a posterized Bryant being rejected by Paul Pierce in the finals.
And domestic life will be uneasy at best this off-season, following reports that the league MVP has been romantically involved with one of the Laker girls (who shares the same name as his wife, Vanessa).
What, then, could be a more fitting end to this week of ignominy than an expletive-filled diss from Shaquille O’Neal? An expletive-filled diss from Shaquille O’Neal set to music.
The storied Shaq-Kobe feud reignited on Monday after a videoclip surfaced of O’Neal rebuking his former teammate during an impromptu freestyle performance. In the video, Shaq rhymes “Check it, you know how I be. Last week Kobe couldn’t do without me,” before leading the crowd in the refrain, “Kobe, tell me how my ass tastes.”
The insults are punctuated by a crowd of enthusiastic club-goers, who ignore Shaq’s complete inability to rap and instead revel in Bryant’s downfall. In response to questions from ESPN, Shaq had the following to say about the video:
“I was freestyling. That’s all. It was all done in fun. Nothing serious whatsoever. That is what MC’s do. They freestyle when called upon. I’m totally cool with Kobe. No issue at all. And by the way, don’t forget, six albums, two platinum, two gold. Anybody who knows me knows I’m a funny freestyler. Check the NBA DVD when I was rapping about Vlade Divac during my first championship run. Please tell everybody don’t make something out of nothing.”
“Everyone that knows Shaq knows two things about me: One, that I’m a rapper, and two, that I’m a comedian.”
As a long-time devotee of MC Shaq (I found one of his albums in a parking garage once), it’s easy to read between the lines: the gauntlet has been thrown and the rap battle is on. Kobe either lays down a Shaq diss or gets punked by the big man.
» Shaq raps on New York stage, takes shots at Kobe (ESPN)
» Wikipedia article on the Shaq-Kobe feud
» Kobe’s Vanessas (BuzzFeed.com)